General Theological Seminary through the eyes of Screwtape

My Dear Wormwood, I am immensely pleased at your progress concerning your charges at General Theological Seminary. Your hard work and patience has paid off immensely. The backbiting and conflict have reached such proportions that future tempters will no doubt read about them as part of their underling studies. I must congratulate you on your use of the “Acceptance” tactic. Other tempters have been wildly successful using the tactic against departing dioceses and congregations. And I must say the sweet sound of, “I accept the renunciation of your ordination vows,” causes immense pleasure in all of us. But you have taken it to a level never before seen. All of your predecessors used the tactic against the others - those who threatening to leave the Church. But you have successfully implemented it against beloved seminary professors. To that I say bravo! I believe the success lies in the fact that our efforts have effectively closed the door on reconciliation. One we closed it on huge matters concerning property, schism and doctrine, you were able to keep it closed in matters of shared government, accountability, and respectful behavior. The challenge before you now is to keep each side focused on winning and losing. Do not permit any thoughts of reconciliation, healing, repentance, amendment of life, or any similar sentiments to enter their consciousnesses. (It pains me even to write those words.) Remember the door is closed and you do not want to see it open at all. The smallest crack can bring such noxious hope to the table that all would be lost. If these thoughts do arise, suggest to your charges that by now they are simply not possible, or suggest that the cost would be too high. By all means available you want to keep them fighting. Your continued use of secrets will be very helpful indeed in keeping your charges off balance. But do not refer to them as secrets, as that may alert them to your influence. Instead use more virtuous sounding terms like “confidentiality,” or “sealed records.” The absence of information has the delightful side effect that your charges will fill the gaps in their knowledge with the worst possible outcome without any help from you, thus aiding you in your task. If your charges begin to show alarming behavior such as adopting virtue, listening, considering another’s point of view, etc. etc., simply suggest that extremely harmful ramifications would occur should they undertake such efforts. The only human completely immune to this tactic to my knowledge was that deplorable Christus, who chose to die rather than succumb to temptation. That one act set back our cause immensely so you must prevent similar occurrences at all costs. Yes General Theological Seminary is suffering greatly thanks to your influence. Keep up your attacks and its continued downfall will bring such admiration from the lowerarchy that you will benefit greatly and build quite the name for yourself in the nether regions. Your affectionate uncle, Screwtape